最近过的好累。小小的快乐，多多的不开心。好像什么东西做错了。什么再提醒着我。现在的我和我认识的我差好多。潜移默化的改变，吓到自己了。什么时候开始的，我也不知道。但是改变，要从现在开始，不然会刺伤人的。过去做错的事，错过的东西，一一浮现在脑海里。改不了了。如果像哲学家所说的，把每天当作最后一天来生活，我大概会因后悔而死掉。
以前的我给人的印象是怎样的？我变了吗？答案搜索中。。。
让别人快乐的同时，自己也会快乐。我似乎忘了这句话的意思。
Been thinking a lot lately… about what I wanna become after I graduate.. What kind of life I wanna lead.. Where I wanna settle into.. What kind of life I’m able to provide for my parents and what they want…
I feel old, ok more grown up to put nicely. Never thought about these deeply before actually. Being the always happy go lucky girl who enjoyed her life for the past 24years of her life, things have been good all the time, cas my parents provided me well, but I dun want them to do it much longer after I start working. But, what do I want and how can I do to help them. Different people have different life to lead, some may live under the light as a star, wanting more freedom; others may look at the stars like lights, wanting to be them. There is no right or wrong ans, is to the root of what we want, and what do I want? And where is my ability able to bring me to?
Have to keep reminding myself how fortunate I am these days. I got drifted off with how good life can be, losing sight of how good my already is. So I do need these constant reminders. And being the very spoilt only child (I seldom admit it), I sometimes forget to look out for the people around me. And that I need to learn. How to bring a smile onto someone’s face? How to make a day better for others? Is like a child, knowing she needs to leave home soon and finally admitting all her flaws in her character and looking into them. I know it is definitely late, but just let there be a chance and time for me to make up for it. Dun take it away too fast, too early. Sometimes, I dive deep into my thoughts of how another person I would have became if I had not decided to follow my parents 14years ago. How them would be the case?
Thinking and thinking, I feel weaker every day. These are not thoughts what give me strength, maybe the final conclusion will, I don’t know. Is it too late to change, at this stage, at this age?
风云起伏，变化莫测;
人生宿命，千方百种;
风云人生，百种莫测。
今夕不知明朝事，如何如何。。。
life may be limited, but what one can make out of one’s life is far beyond the power of limitation…
just some ideas on my mind the past few days… maybe im slowly moving into the next stage of life… without being consciously aware.. [and that is getting on my nerves..]
当风轻轻的吹过，有谁能感觉到它的故事？
my very first entry after a long long time got deleted 5 min ago.. =(
i wrote a lot about what happened to me the past year.. but nevermind, i will repeat again!
the last 6 months was a life changing experience for me, i have been through my very first OCIP to indonesia, went to stockholm for exchange and stayed in europe for 6 months [i will not say stayed at stockholm for 6 months cas half of the time i has travelling], been through a very difficult period during then because i have lost someone close.. never had the chance to express it out.. 姥爷，我想你！
shall slowly pack this place up with more entries… and photos to come along too!
on a side note, my fyp has been choosen and im starting it soon! excited! =)
exams r over! will be flying off to indonesia for ocip till end dec. till then~
what defines right and what defines wrong.
sometimes, a piece of work done in an hr can be graded as A, but when i really put in time to do it well i get the worst grade ever. i dun feel justified. is my real work tt bad?
i need confidence to face the upcoming exams. please… dun let this happen again.. i need confidence. there is still hope and there is still chance…
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good judgment comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgment.
